I think I remember thinking time

The time allotted to study should be divided into three parts. A third should be devoted to the Written Law, a third to the Oral Law: and the last third should be spent in reflection, deducing conclusions from premises, developing implications of statements, comparing dicta, studying the hermeneutical principles by which the Torah is interpreted, till one knows the essence of the principles, and how to deduce what is permitted and what is forbidden from what one has learned traditionally. (Mishneh Torah: from 'A Maimonides Reader, Twersky,. Isadore 1972)

One of the things that I am finding hardest about rabbinical school is the lack of time to think!, there is simply too great a volume of material to be plowed though to actually think, hard, about any of it. And this time for reflection and critical thought was one of the best things about graduate school (my MA) and being a research student.  Whereas for almost all the time i've been at rabbinical school there has been so much to do on so many fronts that the thinking about things, really doesn't get done. For large parts of the time I am literally on go and active from when I get up until i lie down at night and sleep and nothingness claim me again.  Somehow, all the bits seem to be being put together.  I guess I have my lower brain/unconscious to thank for that. But I really, and deeply miss the opportunities for reflection I used to have.  Thats why I found this quotation from the Rambam so meaningful. I also know from other sources how little time for study Maimonides actually had, having read his rather moving letter that outlined his typical day.
I think that I also feel the need for these times for reflection because of my personality type, which normally comes out as either an ISFJ or as an IiNTJ but in any case as some who is introverted.  I simply need time and space on my own to go over and process what I've learnt and the interactions I've had.
This is why I miss the PCCS classes we had last year, which although 'death Thursdays', as we foundly called them, were emotionally difficult. They did at least provide reflective space for at least some aspects of the course.

Now don't misunderstand I am interested in all my subjects. In fact I am intensely interested in some of them, but because of the sheer amount of stuff to read, to translate to try and understand I simply feel that I am not getting to grips with anything on its deeper levels.

But maybe I just have to accept that thats okay.

The above notwithstanding things are still going somewhere between good and okay (and I'll more than take that.)